Love vs Reality: What Relationships Really Need | Episode 104

Welcome back to another episode of Cup of Conversation — where we have conversations worth having ☕✨

This week, we’re getting a little more intimate… literally and figuratively. From upgrading our set to finally revealing the story behind our NEW sign (y’all… we really thought we got scammed 😭), this episode starts with real-life lessons about trust, risk, and doing things on your own with no backing but faith and hard work.

But then we get into the REAL conversation…

What if love was the only thing that mattered in dating?

We’re breaking down:

Would relationships last longer or fall apart faster?

Do we actually love people… or just what they provide?

Can love exist without structure, discipline, and accountability?

Are standards shaped by survival… or genuine connection?

Do gender roles still exist if everything is based on love?

And let’s be real…
Is love REALLY enough?

We also get into some spicy “Last Sip” questions:

Love with struggle or comfort without love?

Fun but irresponsible vs. responsible but “boring”?

What does “fun” even mean in relationships?

This episode is honest, funny, and a little too real — the kind of conversation that might have you rethinking how you date, love, and choose your partner.

💬 Join the conversation in the comments:
Do you think love alone can sustain a relationship?

Don’t forget to LIKE, COMMENT & SUBSCRIBE for more conversations worth having 💛

#CupOfConversation #DatingTalk #LoveAndRelationships #BlackPodcast #RelationshipDebates #ModernDating

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:14

What's up, everybody? Welcome back to another Cup of Conversation. Where we have conversations worth having. I'm your girl T. And I'm your girl Coco. And welcome to episode 104. Four. Yes. Episode 104.

SPEAKER_02 0:32

I like, I kind of I kind of like it. I do. It's a little more club intimate.

SPEAKER_00 0:37

Yes, yes. I like it in here. It might look the same to y'all, but it's a little different to us. Yeah. Yeah. Everything is the same to y'all. But um, we're jazzing up the set here. I'm really getting, I'm really liking these vibes. Like as I've been watching it, the sign is everything. The sign. I I love the sign.

SPEAKER_02 0:53

Y'all, the story about the sign though. And I got it.

SPEAKER_00 0:57

You never told them the story about the sign, to be honest.

SPEAKER_02 1:00

Let me tell them real quick. Go ahead, go ahead. Okay, real quick, y'all. So mind you, me and T is um, we are, let me use correct grammar. We are like a one, we solo. We don't have no people that put money on us, put money into us. We ain't got no sugar daddies, none of that. So whatever money we make at our just nine to fives is what we put into our podcast, whether we get it back or not.

SPEAKER_01 1:24

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 1:24

And so getting this sign was one of the things that we was like, okay, we're gonna have we're gonna spend a little money, you know,$500,$600, you know, get a sign. And that's kind of good because we do have each other because some people are doing it by themselves. So it's good. But anyways, so I'll it was my task to get the sign. And I go, you know, my good old faithful, I go, I I did go to like Google local stuff around here, but it wasn't gonna come in time and it wasn't gonna be the price that we were looking for. So I go to the Facebook market, and I'm like, okay, I'll find somebody like, oh yeah, I can do it. It's in our price range, you know. First of all, them should have been red flags, but I'm like, me being me, I'm gonna roll with it. And I'm like, if if I gotta take the hit for this, I'm gonna take the hit for this. But whatever. So we find the people, they like, okay, we can do it. Mind you, the day I was supposed to get the sign, I sent first of all, I had to send her half of the money up front before I ever got anything.

SPEAKER_00 2:18

So we already got our feet in the water. We don't even know what we're doing.

SPEAKER_02 2:20

We don't even know exactly, exactly. We don't even know. First of all, we don't even know if it's a man or a woman, but I did do my due diligence because I saw her, I said she sent me back people that she had done work for before. And so I called like a list of people, and I didn't even tell T this part, but half of the people on the list that I called, they didn't know who them people was and who I was talking about. It was literally one lady that owned a snow stone, a snow cone stand that's closed down now. And she was like, Oh, I do remember them. Yeah, they did my knee unsign. It's a husband and wife. That's how I even knew it was a husband and wife. She was like, da-da-da-da. And I was like, I'm literally on lunch duty at work. Do you know uh they said they made your sign? I'm like on the phone because I'm like, if if if T find out I didn't give these people our money, anyways. And uh so the day I suppose to get the sign, I told her to meet me. She came texting me, hey, I can't meet today. I had a long day. I'm like, oh shit, we didn't got for the time. They didn't get me. They didn't got us. They got us. So I'm like, okay, I didn't tell T. She was like, I can meet you. I promise I can come anywhere you want me to come tomorrow. I'm like, okay, I'm gonna give us her tomorrow. Mind you, this is the my day, the before we need it for the for the 100th episode. So I'm like, okay, I'll give her my work address. I leave work. She like, I'm gonna be there at five. I get off at 4:45. She was like, I'm gonna be there at five. I'm like, okay, I'm sitting in the parking lot on the phone. Five roll around. 515 roll around. I'm sorry, we stuck by the and I say, bro, we about I might have to call T.

SPEAKER_00 3:47

Yeah, you thought she was just gonna keep on coming with things.

SPEAKER_02 3:51

So I said, okay, I live not far from my job. Let me go home. She said, I could be there at six. I said, okay, by the time I go home, use the restroom, give me a little ice, you know, refocus. So the whole time I'm on the phone looking for other people, because I'm like, I'm just not even gonna tell T. I'm just gonna pay for what the fuck up. I'm just gonna pay for the fuck up. So then I get there at six, and she they pulls up, and then now my thought is okay, it's gonna be they here, but the sign ain't gonna be what we thought it was gonna be. It's gonna be little as hell, or it's gonna be janky as hell or something. Yeah, when we got this song, Corey, give them the sign. Oh, okay. When we got this sign, I was like, oh my gosh, thank you. Oh, thank you. I'm I'm I'm getting they lights a play. I'm taking pictures. I'm like, because if this sign don't work, I'm thinking all of our theme, but it came out, y'all. The sign came out beautiful. Like, I wish I had their name and stuff so we could really show it. Yeah, if if y'all need a sign, they do LED signs, they do these type of signs with the backlight in the wood sign, whatever kind of sign you need. And like when I say the turnaround time was literally like a week.

SPEAKER_00 4:54

And it came out so good. Like, yes, and it's our logo, they got the logo perfect, like, and I you was really taking pictures of them people uh license, all kind of stuff, but that's not where the story ends, right? Because y'all about say you done took them the last part.

SPEAKER_02 5:10

I got so excited to have the sign that instead of sending them the remaining balance, which was like the other half of the payment, I sent them the original full payment of the thing, not remembering. Remember the deposit. Not remembering, I had already sent them. So I'm gone. I'm in the car on the phone. T T, you look so good. The lady like calling me. I'm like, why she calling me? So I'm like ignoring it because we on the phone. The lady, like, I think you sent me too much money, y'all. Whole time I'm thinking the lady gonna scam me. I didn't scam my damn self. Like, like I was like, oh my god, just moving too fast. So the whole situation turned out to be a great situation, like a great be lucky she's a good Samaritan. No, for real.

SPEAKER_00 5:50

Because I'd have thought that was a tip and went home.

SPEAKER_02 5:52

No, would have been a tip, wouldn't have thought it was a bit. That would have been a tip, but that's that that's what this it pays to do the right thing in your life because good things do come back to you when just when you least expect it. So yeah, that's our sign story. Now we got a nice sign, and this is gonna be our sign for a long time.

SPEAKER_00 6:08

Yep. All right, until we up the antsy again, because that's what that's all we do around here. We just get one place and we like, oh, that's good. We didn't dig it. On to the next idea.

SPEAKER_01 6:19

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 6:20

But speaking of on to the next, we're gonna go to the main topic of the day. And of course, this came from um, I always like to reference Bridgeting when I bring when I reference love. Because it's just very old school. I I even posted about it.

SPEAKER_02 6:32

Watch it one time.

SPEAKER_00 6:33

I even posted about it the other day because it's very just authentic, old school. Like, we ain't worried about who could pay, you know, a beer. We ain't worried about who can who's popular or not, or who can cook and clean the best, who the biggest rapper, who got the biggest chain or the nicest car, or none of that. We just in love, you know what I mean? Like, we just in love. And I wanted to know, it kind of brought about the idea of what would like the world look like if we really subtracted all the stuff that we had to factor in when picking people we love. And is the love authentic if we do have to do all that factoring in? Like, do you really love that person wholeheartedly, or could you probably have had a soulmate that ain't up to whatever par that you had, what standards you had? Right. So my first question would be um, would uh relationships be more about compatibility if we took out the factor of financial stability? Um if you were able to bear children, if you are able to well, I guess some things are non-negotiable to some people, because they're standards of what they want in life. But do you think your standards would be as high if you didn't have to factor in certain things?

SPEAKER_02 7:51

Um Do I think my standards would be as high if I didn't have to think about like the finances of distance?

SPEAKER_00 7:58

Right. Um say y'all were born into a family like a a uh what they call what's that um the most the microsoft nigga, the whatever, you know, with all the money. Like say y'all was born into a family like that, like you just ain't gotta worry about nothing. Like you just gotta worry about living life. Or just say we stay in a world where people don't work. We we just get up and live our life every day. We got, you know.

SPEAKER_02 8:27

Yes, okay, so could I I think the focus for me then would be just like the type of person that that person is. Like, okay, yeah, we're not including work, but like if you were still like this type of person to where we didn't have to work and you just stayed at home all the time and you was just like a couch potato or something like that, or like you know, and not it because and not I'm not thinking about it because I'm like, you don't got no money, you don't got no money, but just the type of person that's like an ick of mine. Like a man that don't move, a man that moves slow is a ick to me. Yeah, like just in general, like if you walk slow, if you drag your feet, that's a huge ick. Like, don't don't be a man and drag your feet.

SPEAKER_00 9:03

Like do something like do something, bitch.

SPEAKER_02 9:07

Like, get up get the fuck out.

SPEAKER_00 9:09

I know I feel you on that.

SPEAKER_02 9:10

So like I think that it just would come down to like the characteristics of a person because I I honestly, y'all know I'm a whore. You know, I'm like hard on a nigga. I'm hard on myself, I'm hard on a nigga too. Like, so I'm like, don't just give me like bum vibes, don't just give me like don't care vibes. And I think love for me, it runs out so fast. Like, love don't be enough.

SPEAKER_00 9:37

Okay, that's that's kind of my point because for like I feel like for some people, and I'm not just gonna put it on men, for some people, physical attraction, I'm attracted to you, I love you. Um, we get along, you know what I'm saying? All those like surface level boxes are checks, so that's good enough for me. But I'm that way too. I need to be stimulated another way. I need to be stimulated by watching you move your everyday life. Like, I need you to prioritize yourself. Like, would you be a good person if you didn't have to go, you know what I'm saying, show up to church this week, or if you didn't have to show up to work and smile and stuff, would you still go around smiling? Like, what would be how would you be if you know you didn't have to do all those things?

SPEAKER_02 10:21

Yeah, because once we lay down, we do what we do, and then we get up, like that's that's that's over with. Now what?

SPEAKER_00 10:29

Exactly.

SPEAKER_02 10:29

So I think we if we if we took out all the factors like the financial, the kids, the this, the that, I feel like it'll be we'll live in a world of now what?

SPEAKER_00 10:39

So are relationships about um relationship roles about love, or is it about um survival and structure of how we're gonna keep this thing rolling day to day? Because even though we ain't gonna have jobs, or we, you know, we we using that as a scenario, or you might be set where you don't need a job, you still have to have some kind of structure in life or discipline about yourself to where you ain't just falling off the deep end.

SPEAKER_02 11:04

Right. And so I think it's gonna come to what it always comes to is it's gonna have to be a little bit of both. It's gonna have to be a little bit of love and it's gonna have to be a little bit of structure because I gotta love you enough to make to stick through when the structure ain't all the way there yet. Right, right. You know what I'm saying? So it's gonna be components of love that I need, but it's also gonna be that structure that lets me know that we're making some strides towards something, some type of growth gotta be there. Right. I think if we don't have those components in it, I think also relationships win last long because once that surface level phase is done, once I know all I can know about you, once I love you, to I can't love your draws no more, then okay, it's on to the next person to love. Right, right.

SPEAKER_00 11:47

It's nothing, it's no blissful, you know. Right. Once that bliss is over, it's no struggle there. It's no you kind of answer my next question. So will people stay in love longer or leave faster? Leave faster. Leave faster.

SPEAKER_02 11:58

Mm-hmm. Yeah, definitely.

SPEAKER_00 12:00

I definitely agree because dysfunction starts to happen once you get to know somebody after that bliss. Like, if they aren't that person that you like, you said some people might be cool with a couch potato. I'm a couch potato too. We sit around, we could couch potato together. But then if we get into something that's opposite of what, you know, the common. Yeah, you know that say opposite is a track. I don't know. I feel like we need to be uh at least close together. Like we can't be this far apart. We gotta be somewhere in the vicinity and we gotta be pushing one another. And I feel like your inspiration should come from the leader of the house. Like that person ought to be inspiring, that person ought to be get up and go. Like you, like you just said, I can't stand on men who sit still because that not gonna say wanna make me want to sit still, but if I feel like, well, one, it does kind of make people want to sit still. And then two, if I get tired of sitting still and I feel like I'm doing more than you, that makes me feel like mentors, yeah. Because that makes me feel like you're not trying to max out your potential. You're not trying to do everything you can do. Be the leader that you wanna you you should want to be, I guess. So you didn't do you think gender roles will be like if if that was the case, if we only had to focus on love, do you think gender roles will still be the same? The man will still be the leader of the house, he'll be.

SPEAKER_02 13:19

I think it wouldn't matter much then if it was just all about love, I guess. Well, it will um I take that back. I think that it would because I think a part of love is servitude. And I think that even if you only loved, you would have to, you you, the man being a leader, maybe he would have to outserve you in love. Like making sure your water bottle full when you go to bed. Oh, baby, you you love me. Oh, okay. I love you a little bit more now. Like it's like it's still something to kind of tip or tag, like, or you know, you love me, oh, this makes me love you even more, or you love me, this make me, you know what I'm saying? So it's still something there, but like I said, I feel like that's just gonna it's gonna go away quick though. Like, how much serving can we really do that don't have nothing to do with money?

SPEAKER_00 14:02

And so that brings me to like why work and I mean I understand love as it pertains to God is love and everything around us is like in love is God. Like if you if it's in love, it's in God. Like, so I I understand it when it pertains to that, but I can't understand why we would attach ourselves that that kind of makes me think when I'm when we're thinking about this topic specifically, that kind of thing makes me think why people would attach themselves to people in that way if it wasn't just about love.

SPEAKER_02 14:40

Because I feel like the reason people don't attach why they would attach their self because if you just have love, what else do you what else do you know how to do when it's when it's not about love? Because even if we lived in a world of not work, let's take a work away from it. Even if when I when I come into contact with grief, my mama die. My grandma, you know what I'm saying? How are you gonna approach that? That don't that I don't need you to just love me right now. I need I need something else from you at this time.

SPEAKER_01 15:13

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 15:13

Like I need another aspect of you. And if you don't have that, then all of them days where we was loving and loving and loving, we not gonna be able to last because you don't have that other component. You don't have that other understanding, you don't know how to help me uh regulate my emotions. You don't, you know, all those other things that we need in a relationship, you don't have if all you have is love.

SPEAKER_00 15:37

Right, right. So it kind of factors in like um those rainy days, those bad times where I need more from you. I need a little bit, you know. Mm-hmm. Yeah. That makes sense. That makes sense. But it just makes more, I don't know. I think if we made more of a I would say the world that we live in has us um love is important, but like you said, we do need it on those bad days and stuff like that. But I think the world that we live in kind of dumbs love down more than necessary just because we have to focus on, oh, who can do this and if if a woman can do that, or if a man can do this. It's so exhausting and so draining that you almost forget that, oh yeah, we do gotta love each other and like each other. Like this can't just be no agreement where we just, you know, or and some people are just in agreements. Let's not skip over that. Some people are in the streets.

SPEAKER_02 16:32

But two things came to mind. I think that it becomes second nature a lot of times for women because we do love. And first of all, it's multiple types of love. We we gotta know that too. Right. But I think for women, it it comes second nature because we do. We are we are some of the most lenient when it comes to being with somebody. Like we see the potential in a nigga all the time. We're gonna love you through your until you get to this, da da da da. And we gonna we're gonna forgive you when you leave us after you get what you got while you was with us. Like, we're gonna, we're some of the most forgiving, most loving creatures, I believe. And I think it's only for men to really, not only for men, but it's a lot of the times men are the people that need to think like, do I love this woman for real? Or is it am I just with her because she can cook real good? We we we jump we lead with love, right? I think women lead with love a lot of times. So it's it's not even that it's not happening, it's just so second nature. That's you know, that's what we taught to do outside of being taught to be with a nigga for money, right? Like most black women, we're taught to really find love, somebody that loves you, like even when you think about it. Um, Carrie and Cari. You he teaching her to be with somebody that loves her, like he does. You get what I'm saying? So that's how we initially taught. We're not he's not telling her, Oh, if a nigga can't do this for you, yeah, you know, so sometimes you do say stuff like that. But you know, if but for the most part, like it's showing you that I love you that I'm doing because I'm doing this, not because I got money because I'm doing this, I'm showing you this because I love you. So I think that that's one part of it. And then the other part of it is I don't think even men or women are loving unconditionally for real. So when I say it's different types of love, you got that a lot of people have that surface level.

SPEAKER_00 18:21

Yeah, they have conditions on the the type of love that they pass on. That's what I mean by like people. Oh, I I love you, but if you can't do this, then I don't know about that. Like, so how do you navigate that? I don't know about that space. Like, cause I mean, it do get to a point where, yeah, look, like you said, love ain't enough. Like, we need this to be done on this side. Like, it's you can't keep on tipping the scales like that. Like, this shit needs some attention. We love the fuck out of each other now. No, I don't know now.

SPEAKER_02 18:54

Like, but now when it comes in, I don't know. Yeah, and I don't think it's no love lost, I think it's just a part of like you having a goal, yeah, and wanting to get there. And what it takes to get there is not just love alone, and that's just the reality of life. Like, it's not just for me to be able to be an exemplar teacher, I can't just love my kids. That's not enough, right? You gotta do the work behind closed doors. You gotta actually, if you love your kids, you have to show the love through the stuff.

SPEAKER_00 19:22

This is what this is what love looks like in action, right? So, yeah, that definitely makes sense.

SPEAKER_02 19:26

And that goes with anything in life. I think even when you take it outside of a relationship, like I just said, with teaching, like yeah, I love y'all, but if I love y'all, I'm gonna be up at night or I'm gonna be set aside time to go over my lesson plans. I'm gonna be up uh creating scaffolds and this and that and all these things to help you understand whatever I need you to understand better. So yeah.

SPEAKER_00 19:49

So if love was the only concern in dating, many of us might choose differently. But the real challenge is love, um, I mean, isn't just finding love, it's finding somebody who you can be in love with. So you think that if most young, like the younger generation thought like that, that they would have more lengthier or not, I would say more grace for their partner. Or do you think that they in a mindset of too much grace? Like they letting too much slide without getting meeting that boundary need. Because I feel like I think personally, especially in the black community, we let a lot of shit slide. Like it's like a skating ring around here. Like we all, you know, kind of hide, um, sweep stuff up under the rug, hide and not correct people in those spaces. So do you think we already given enough grace or we need to give a little more grace?

SPEAKER_02 20:48

I don't think it's grace that we need. I think it's accountability that we need. I think that um we can all give grace and all of that, but I feel like if we're not accountable for our own actions and the roles that we play in relationships, and the roles that we play in what we want and what we're doing to get it for ourselves, versus I think we like to place the blame on why we don't have stuff or why we can't do stuff on other people. Right. That's gonna lead me into our next topic, too. Is um, you know, if we focus more on the accountability part than the blame in game, like or what can you be doing, why you ain't doing if I'm working at my full potential. I think that especially for like um uh women and me in type of relationship, I feel like most of the time when I see Carrie at his full potential, it makes me want to be in my full potential. I kind of sit back and be like that's what I mean by like the inspiration.

SPEAKER_00 21:45

Yeah, like supposed to lead like that. Like I feel like oh, I guess this is just a preference for me. I don't I can't speak for everybody, but for me, I want a man that is leading in inspiration. You don't have to be Leading financially always like you don't have to always be the top dollar moneymaker around there. I need you to be leading in getting up off the couch and working out or reading the Bible or doing this or doing that in discipline. I need you to be leading in discipline and structure so you can create a household that's in discipline and structure. And that will go back to a lot of those what I was saying about like in our black in our community, we break the boundaries and just let stuff slide. That discipline and structure will stop a lot of that if we set our foot down and say, no, this is what we do every day. And you don't gotta go. If I if I say I don't eat pork no more and I go to Big Mama's house and she's serving pork, well, I'm just not gonna eat no more. You know like I just don't have to fall, I don't have to keep on breaking my boundaries like that for every little thing.

SPEAKER_01 22:48

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 22:50

Yeah.

unknown 22:50

I agree.

SPEAKER_00 22:51

And you said that's gonna fall into your topic that we're talking about next episode. Okay, okay, okay. I like that. I like that. Um, I do got a couple of last sips. These are kind of just uh up upon the topic. Um, so would you go with love with a little struggle or deep comfort with um no comfort without deep love. Like, you know.

SPEAKER_02 23:15

So first, so the love with a little struggle, I do love with a little struggle.

SPEAKER_00 23:19

Okay, okay. I'm gonna say what you was gonna say in the reason.

SPEAKER_02 23:24

I was just gonna say the reason I would do that is because I think in order for a man to really be with a woman successfully, I think they have to have love for you. Like it Yeah. I think you become expendable when a man really don't love you. Right. You become uh just an option.

SPEAKER_00 23:38

I seen somebody say the other day that um if you are building it up with him, then he'll respect you more. But if you come after it's already built, then he ain't gonna have that kind of respect for you. It was a man, too. I can't even remember what podcast it was. I was trying to think, but yeah, I do find truth in that because if you just jump on a bandwagon at the end, he's gonna cheat on you. I mean, like, gonna cheat on you. Like, you ain't help you ain't cooked the meal, you ain't here building it up, like and it's not even that he just gonna cheat on you.

SPEAKER_02 24:11

It's just that he's not gonna he's I think that it's gonna be easier in his mind to rationalize that this woman is here for what I have. Yeah, it's just it just it's just one of those things, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 24:23

And then they'll lose respect for you, and then he's gonna cheat on you because then he's gonna go find a woman that he's gonna make this man cheat. For real, because then he's gonna go find a woman that he feels like, oh, he she loved me for me, but then he's gonna find out her ass is what's gonna be a cycle because that's what he leads with. That's those kind of guys.

SPEAKER_02 24:39

So but and and it's also really true that most men, the greatness that most men carry, it comes, it's not coming from a woman, but it it's brought forth by having a supportive or you know, nurturing woman in real life. Like most of the time, men, even if it's not their wife or something, it's some woman in their life that was there that was like, do this, do this, right, right, right, do it like this, handle it like this. So, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 25:04

Somebody that they went to all the time. Yeah. Um, a partner who cleans house or a partner who pays bills.

SPEAKER_02 25:13

For for as a as a woman, me being a woman, ethnicist.

SPEAKER_00 25:17

This or that.

SPEAKER_02 25:19

I'ma need a little both. But but you got I'ma need a little both because I I'm I'm I'm very heavy on I'm not your mama. Just because I'm your wife, don't treat me like the hip. Don't treat me like the housemaid. You get what I'm saying? Like, I have more value than that. Right. Y'all know from last episode. Don't just put me in cooking, house making. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So um, but for for I'm gonna say both because for me, I want you to be able to exempt. I need you to know how to clean up, I need you to know how to cook, I need you to take the load off.

SPEAKER_00 25:50

We need to see what you could do, just what you gonna do for me, like right, whether I'm here or not. Yeah, for you, like what would you do?

SPEAKER_02 25:57

Yeah, I need a little bit of both. I I you got to have a little money though.

unknown 26:01

Hang on.

SPEAKER_02 26:03

You gotta have you gotta have some money, or you gotta be actively, diligently working towards getting some money.

SPEAKER_00 26:10

I think, man, I think these younger, when we say stuff like that, and I I wanna be, I be wanting to agree with and say stuff like that too, but I think so many young people when they hit that, get it so misconstrued, like they they they like, all that's all you gotta have. You ain't gotta have no love for me or nothing. Like, all you gotta have is the money. And I'm like, y'all losing the plot.

SPEAKER_02 26:29

You gotta have some intensity. Y'all are losing the plot for yourself, like you, and like you keep on bringing it back too with or without me. Because whether a man will cheat on you, don't have nothing to do with you.

SPEAKER_00 26:39

But you are you a liar?

SPEAKER_02 26:41

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 26:41

In real life, like do you just lie about shit?

SPEAKER_02 26:44

Like, yeah, you gotta have your own type of.

SPEAKER_00 26:47

I I need to see what you gonna do. Go be what you gonna do. Go. I need what you gonna like. What are you gonna do?

SPEAKER_02 26:54

What'd they say? What you gonna do? Migma knows it for you. Yes.

SPEAKER_00 26:57

What are you gonna do for yourself? Um, okay, my last one is fun but irresponsible, or irresponsible, but boring. I mean, or responsible but boring. I've been struggling with that lately. I'm not gonna lie.

SPEAKER_02 27:13

Um, if I'm being honest, I'll take boring and responsible any day.

SPEAKER_00 27:21

I'm trying to be grown, but I don't really want to be boring, you know.

SPEAKER_02 27:24

I'm already boring. That's what I'm saying. If I'm being honest, I'm I'm already boring myself. I'd rather us just be chill. But but but boring to me is fun, though. That's what I'm saying. So that's what it is. It's it's that's subjective because what might be boring to you is fun to me. You get what I'm saying? And what might be fun to me might be boring to you. You get what I'm saying? So that's subjective.

SPEAKER_00 27:44

But we can't just call stuff that's like taking a nap fun. Like we we gotta be for real. Like that, like I like taking a nap. See a nap a little bit. I knew you was talking about like laying on the couch. I find that fun. Like, yeah, no, we can't, we can't do that. We gotta okay, maybe if you find painting fun, that's different. Okay. Somebody might say that's boring, but that, you know, you find fun. But like, I'm talking about like actually having some kind of hobby, no matter how big or small of a scale it is. Like, fun. Like, do you got something you do, fuck nigga? Like, what do you like? I need fun. I need you to be responsible too.

SPEAKER_02 28:28

Because what is fun? What is fun?

SPEAKER_00 28:31

A hobby or something you do that you that you find joy in.

SPEAKER_02 28:35

Like, because it don't have to be a hobby. I don't think fun has to be a hobby.

SPEAKER_00 28:39

What you think it gets? What do you think it is? I don't know. What it gotta be, what it gotta be for you because you had GPT.

SPEAKER_02 28:48

That's who I'm asking.

SPEAKER_00 28:49

I already know.

SPEAKER_02 28:50

What does the word fun mean? How many minutes do we got? We got enough time? Okay. Fun is it says fun generally means something that brings enjoyment, pleasure, amusement, or lighthearted happiness. It ref it refers to experiences that people make feel that people that make people feel relaxed, entertained, or joyful. So fun don't necessarily have to be.

SPEAKER_00 29:15

I'm mad that they put relaxed in there.

SPEAKER_02 29:16

Yeah. Fun is going to the spa. That might not be fun to somebody. So that's what I'm saying. I feel like I could do boring because what most people, what society deems is boring is a lot of the stuff that I see is fun. So that's why I'm saying boring based on society. You get what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_00 29:34

I guess. I mean, I'm thinking more like of a hobby, something like I compared the paint thing, like something you can do. I mean, going to the spa, that's I like to talk too.

SPEAKER_02 29:46

I find talking fun. Okay, I like stuff like that too. So I'm just looking at engagement. You're mentally or emotionally involved, and I'm thinking, okay, engagement. Something that kind of stimulates me.

SPEAKER_00 29:55

Like, you know what I mean? They when after I leave, I got that little dopamine feeling. So talking, I guess that's fun. I'm talking about like just go-ko riding. You talking about Yeah, like horseback riding, uh, ATV riding.

SPEAKER_02 30:11

I'm talking about So some of that stuff don't seem fun to me because it seems like work. It seems like I'm gonna be out of breath. So I'm not gonna go to those as fun. Cause when I rode a horse, I was sore the next day while I was on there. It was hurting my cat. I was like, it was just too much. It was just so I don't know. So I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 30:31

But in the moment, it's really fun.

SPEAKER_02 30:33

Um, it was just a thing to do that I wouldn't consider that fun.

SPEAKER_00 30:36

That's crazy. That's crazy.

SPEAKER_02 30:38

So it's like that's what I'm saying. That's subjective.

SPEAKER_00 30:40

At the bottom, the bottom line, I I would probably pick responsible too. Because you don't want no irresponsible nigga.

SPEAKER_02 30:46

Listen, different type of funds: social fun, laughing, hanging out, conversation, activity fun. You're an activity fun type of person. So I guess you got to put that on it. It got creative fun and it got uh experimental.

SPEAKER_00 30:58

I guess that's what I mean by hobbies, having something pottery, you know.

SPEAKER_02 31:02

Because I'm a experimental and social fun, I think. I don't really oh, I like creative fun too. I'm a creative fun and uh activity. So if I had to pick, I would be social and experimental. So travel events, um, and then like laughing, hanging out conversation. That's what is experimental was experimental is travel events and new experiences.

SPEAKER_00 31:22

Oh, okay, okay. Um, I mean, yeah, I like new experiences too. But I think if I had to pick my top two, it would probably be activity and creative, yeah, and creative building things, music, art design, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, yeah, I like that. But yeah, y'all, that was another one. That'll really last sip. Perfect. That'll wrap up this episode. I think we did good on time today. Yeah, we did. All right, y'all. We're getting them in and I'm getting them gone. See y'all next week.